Well I’ll be (amster)dam

That’s right folks, if you couldn’t guess from my awful pun I was in Amsterdam this week!

Yes, that is the city with prostitutes in windows, legal weed bars, an assortment of cheese that would make anyone lactose intolerant, and most importantly stroopwafels! What isn’t to love?

Speaking of love, the wonderful Max Cislo accompanied me on my trip! hehehe It was SOOOO much fun!

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“one of the many corny selfies we took”

For starters, we went to the Anne Frank House. If you aren’t familiar with Anne Frank (than you live under a rock and need to get out more…I mean) than you should know she lived in a secret annex in Amsterdam during World War 2. She along with seven others went into hiding above her fathers old work, but were unfortunately discovered by the SS Army. Her entire family was sent to concentration/death camps and only her father survived. Anne wrote stories about her time as a Jew living in Amsterdam during the World War 2, and she intended for that diary and her stories to be published. After the war, her father returned to the attic to discover his friend secretly kept Anne’s diary. He later on decided to publish the works and now the Anne Frank diary can be purchased anywhere.

It was definitely worth seeing and I would recommend it to anyone! (No I don’t have photos, I was too busy taking it all in, sorry! If you want to see it, then you should go!)

Later that night Max and I went on a canal cruise for lovers. (How much cornier can we get? Oh…challenge excepted.) They served unlimited wine, beer, and cheese (dude I know, DREAM COME TRUE) and took us around the canals. The captain Flip was super friendly. We boarded the ship and he started dancing with me. (Yeah Max was pretty jealous, but I assured him that Flip was just thirty years too old for me, that calmed him down). Besides, Flip cheated on me and started dancing with other girls while they boarded the ship! (Im not salty I swear….)

So we were ending our cruise canal tour and my buddy Flip had to turn the boat around the corner. However, turning a huge canal cruise boat in the Amsterdam canals is almost as bad as trying to make a u-turn in the streets of Milan (If you don’t understand the reference, then you clearly don’t follow my blog and once again I am thoroughly disappointed in your life decisions). SO yeah Flip decides to make this tight turn and while backing up he RAMS THE BOAT INTO THE CANAL WALL. Yes rams it.

Apparently Flip does this often because the cabin crew didn’t seem the least fazed by it. So while I thought that Max was going to be the last person I saw before I died, Flip assured me that things were fine and that life vest were stored under my seat if needed….

ANYWAY we also went to a rooftop bar afterwards! There we saw the beautiful city view of Amsterdam! (Once again no I did not take a photo of the beautiful view, but feel free to take a gander at this lovely photo of Max posing with his martini).

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“holding a martini, must find a way to look manly to compensate”

 

Why am I telling you this story? I swear it’s funny. So after our martinis we wanted to order something off the menu that was cheap. SHOTS! Obviously. However, these shots were actually triple shots on the rocks. We were uninformed about this, I swear! Let’s just say we sipped on straight whiskey. No it was not fun, we couldn’t drink it without wanting to cry from the burning of our insides. Would not recommend to an enemy.

Well, the next day we spent it walking around, buying tulips, and eating stroopwafels! Ohh and eating all of the cheese we could stomach at the Cheese Museum! (It’s FREE) Like I said before, what isn’t there to like about Amsterdam? (The answer is nothing, absolutely nothing).

OH! Before I go, quick tip. The Red Light District is NOT just one street full of prostitutes in windows. There are actually several different pockets of places where a prostitute can purchase a window. I found that out the hard way. Max and I were taking a lovely mid day stroll when I looked into a window and saw a prostitute! Shocking, but like I said what is not to love about Amsterdam?

Well that is all for now! Until next time.

Stay hygge

 

 

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